This weekend DH & I had some heavy conversations about the next step on our journey. One thing that came out of those conversations was that I created a pros & cons list of all the options I can see for us right now. At the end of it, I felt just as hopeless and confused as I did before I started.
The only thing I think I've figured out is that whichever way we go from here, whether we get more testing and treatment or jump back in to TTC or something else, it still involves jumping off a cliff. And there is no way to ensure that our parachute won't fail. So the question isn't whether or not to jump off the cliff, and it's not how to ensure a safe jump. It's just which cliff. And when. Those are the only questions left.
Which cliff do we jump off of?
And when do we take the plunge?
There is no safety net. And we can't see the ground below before we jump. Of any of the cliffs. We'll never see the ground until we land safely.
So which cliff is it to be?
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