Full Life

I just realized today that my life is starting to feel full again. After I began having miscarriages, I withdrew from many aspects of life. I dropped a Jazzercise class I had been taking because I hurt my back, but also because I was so sad, and I couldn't hide it, but everyone there was trying to make me happy, and they wouldn't leave me alone. I stopped volunteering at my favorite community farm because it became a meeting place for mom's with toddlers and preschoolers. I stopped going to church because there were too many nosy people and I didn't know what to say when they asked about my life.

But I also began doing some other things, slowly, over course of the past year. I've made several new friends. I teach Sunday School to stay involved at church (instead of attending services) and lead the children's choir. I volunteer as a music docent, and this year I'll be teaching two classes! I taught my first lessons this week, and they went fabulously! I liked the classroom teacher's I'm assigned to, and they made it clear that they like me, too. :-)

There are some things that I've done all along that I still make an effort to do, like going to my local library and the Farmer's Market, that at least get me out of the house. I also still try to walk or ride my bike for errands whenever I can. And so, after the initial disappointment that it will be 5 or 6 months before we can start TTCAL again, I realized that I can handle the wait. Because my life is once again full of fun, exciting activities. And because there is a time-line to the wait, and every few weeks we will be doing something else testing- or treatment-wise that will put us that much closer to getting cleared to start TTCAL again. I've put up a immunology pre-conception check-list in the side-bar, to help myself see that we are getting stuff done, even in this waiting time.