Going with My Gut

I've had a bad feeling about the reproductive immunology center I've been working with since I first considered them, back in February, after I lost Poppy. This has only intensified with every interaction I have had with them over the past 2 months. I don't like this place. I could give lot's of reasons, but it boils down to a gut feeling of wrongness. It took me 6 months and 2 more losses to get to the point where my need for answers outweighed the fear in my gut.

This week, I discovered that there is another option available to me. It took me just over 24 hours from discovering the new website of this doctor to making the phone call to schedule an initial consult. My gut feeling with this RI (reproductive immunologist) is positive. It was a huge relief to find him, to realize that I had options. The Mister is completely on board with checking out this second doctor. He said that, even if I had found and researched both places before we started the testing process, we still would have started the process with one, and kept the other in the backs of our minds, in case the first one didn't seem right.

I could stack up a lot of reasons why I think I'll end up liking the second doctor better than the first RI center, and why I need to consult with him now, but in the end, it comes down to going with my gut instinct. It's a difficult choice to justify, because it will cost more to go through the initial consult/testing process in two places as once, but I'd rather spend money than time. I don't want to waste my time at an RI center that I don't like when I know I could start with a different doctor from the beginning. We can always make more money, but we can never go back and regain lost time.

Scared but hopeful, that's me right now. And overall, I think I'm more hopeful than scared.